Ladies, please don’t wear shorts

Contrary to popular belief, Canada does have a summer season — and it is hot. This past week Montreal experienced a heat wave and rain that just would. not. break. In addition to the sweltering heat, my eyes were accosted by women in shorts.

Ladies. We are lucky — it is socially acceptable for us to wear dresses and skirts in public without reprise. Dress/skirts provide the all the benefits of shorts with the added bonus of looking feminine and of having air breeze up your legs (hello, increased circulation!)

Mini-shorts

Mini-shorts (and especially those that have words emblazoned across the back) should be banned from all city streets.

Do you see how nice Britney looks in those shorts? See, the thing is, most people aren’t Britney. Generally, thighs jiggle a little bit and no one wants to see your thighs jiggle as you walk your dog. I’m sorry, but that’s a fact of life. No mini-shorts.

Bermuda shorts

Bermuda shorts are look frumpy most of the time

Save yourself the hassle of wondering if you look frumpy in your bermudas and just wear a knee-length skirt. Classy, fashionable and just as cool on a humid day.

Capris

Capris, like bermudas, can look downright frumpy is worn incorrectly. Personally, as a tall girl, most of my pants growing up ended up capris (if you know what I mean), which means that, as an adult, I can’t stand them. To me, it looks like your pants are too small. Like this:

However, if you wear capris that look like they were designed as capris and not as too-short pants, I can see you being able to pull them off. Like this:

So ladies, I beg of you — this summer, when in doubt, wear skirts or dresses!

 

*photo credits: Britney, bermuda shorts, bad capris, good capris